My dog says he found this great list of rules on the Rescuing Animals in Need website. For the whole post, entitled Dear Dogs and Cats, click HERE. But here's the part that I like best:
Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Like to Complain About Our Pets:
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
3. I like my pet a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
5. Dogs and cats are better than kids. They eat less, don't ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive your car, don't hang out with drug-using friends, don't smoke or drink, don't worry about buying the latest fashions, don't wear your clothes, don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and if they get pregnant, you can sell the results.
* BLOGGER'S NOTE: I really don't like that very last line about pregnancy and selling! Always spay and neuter your animals; there are not enough homes for the animals who are already alive! And animals should never be "sold"; they are not property (you buy a couch, but you adopt an animal).